15 July 2008

Kind of sick...

I’m sick again… or so I thought…

It’s been awhile so I thought you might want to hear about it…

I woke up Thursday or Friday with a sore throat… over the weekend I had a few small fevers off and on… I didn’t take my temperature because I couldn’t find the thermometer… but if I would have asked where it was it probably would have been right in front of me as it usually happens when I can’t find anything…

I took it easy most of the weekend and went back to work on Monday… by Tuesday morning about 45 minutes into class I couldn’t talk at all…

My mind started to race… maybe its throat cancer from too much car emissions and trash burns in Uganda… they will probably have to cut out my voice box and hang a chalkboard on a string around my neck and I’ll have to communicate through sketches… so I decided to go to the doctor…

I got into the line at the receptionist but quickly learned it was a free-for-all when the lady with a baby behind me tried to knock me over… soon I was seated in a waiting room with 50 other eager patience hoping for help any minute…

30 minutes later the nurse came out and called my name… “JeRRff Aamungstooon”

I got excited but soon realized she was going to take my temp and blood pressure while I waited… this part was a bit embarrassing… I’ve lost that 12 pounds of McDonalds wait from the US… but I think it was all from my arms…

She put that Velcro blood pressure thing around my bicep and when she let go it immediately slid off to the floor… attempt #2 I curled my arm a bit in hopes it would only slide to my elbow… when she asked me to straighten my arm it fell to the floor again… attempt #3 I suggested that she connect the Velcro to the hair on my tricep… she wasn’t amused… it fell again… attempt #4 she held it in place until it tightened as it filled with air… when I feel better it might be time to do some push-ups…

Back to the waiting room… 80 minutes of counting bricks on the wall passed… I should have brought a book… the doctor called me in and asked what was wrong… in fear of a voice crack I pointed to my throat… he took out his cell phone and turned on the flashlight function… then peered down my throat…

“It doesn’t look too bad… do you want antibiotics anyway?”

“No thanks!” I replied… due to my 2 months of yeast build-up and only eating rice and potatoes in December and January… it’s far too embarrassing to call it a yeast infection from antibiotics… I chose to avoid the antibiotics if possible… so he suggested a blood test…

20 minutes of waiting at the lab… I’m told I should have paid first… $30 later I’m standing at the lab again… 10 minutes in the chair… lab tech draws one vial of blood… back to the waiting room… another 20 minutes of waiting…

Doctor calls me in for the big news… “JeRRff… the average white blood cell count is between 4 and 11… drum roll… yours is 11.7… your really not that sick”

Then to pad my already fragile ego… “maybe you should take a Tylenol”

2.5 hours and 30 bucks to find out I need a 10 cent pill…

4 comments:

Sallie said...

So JeRRf - did the tylenol work?

Love, Mom

Lena said...

hahaha... I love it! At least your back to tylenol and not IV bags hanging from the curtain rods!

Jason Mehl said...

tricep hair--nice

jon said...

I have tricep hair too. The few, the proud.